Parent Presentation Liz Fordham - CEO Natalie Tillett – Operations Manager
The Mind Map Charity We are a small Bedfordshire based charity working in schools to promote the prevention of mental ill-health through whole school teacher training and interactive workshops around emotional literacy and resilience
What are our aims? – To equip schools and families with simple, easy to use tools to support children’s mental and emotional well being – To develop life skills that promote the prevention/early intervention of mental health difficulties
How do we achieve this? B y ‘settling the snow’ in our children’s world
Window of tolerance Fight or Flight Anxiety / Panic Attacks Freeze Depression
How do we ‘settle the snow’ in school? The Mind Map Emotional Literacy Programme • Feelings Flower – a daily barometer of children’s well being, template given to school by the Mind Map • Caterpillar Club – a weekly story outlining different feelings from a workbook given to you by the Mind Map. Usage demonstrated by The Mind Map once per class. • Resilience workshop – a one off workshop lasting 1.5 hours, delivered by The Mind Map for years 3+ • Talk Time – a weekly slot for children to talk, held by a member of school staff following x2 shadow sessions with a member of The Mind Map
How do we ‘settle the snow’ at home? Seeing I see you as an individual and I see your needs Hearing I hear you, you don’t have to give me ‘behaviour’ in order to get noticed Holding Within the home there are boundaries to keep you safe
Holding at home This involves creating a world with boundaries in which children feel safe, secure and wanted. “I AM THE ADULT IN YOUR WORLD”
Flat mountain concept Children need to ‘play’ on top of a ‘flat mountain’
What does holding at home look like in practice? • Predictability – bedtimes, teatimes, creating routines • Boundaries – house rules, clear calm and close instruction, consistent calm consequences (some misbehaviour is normal) • Us as a role model – how do we handle things we don’t like, helping our children to accept rules/limits/things that don’t go their way, helping them to develop self control
‘Seeing’ at home This involves creating a world in which our children know that they are important to us, where they will be noticed, loved and enjoyed because of who they are, not because of what they do.
What does ‘seeing’ at home look like in practice? • Really notice the behaviour you want to see/give little time and attention to the behaviours you don’t want to see • Use descriptive praise/say what you see – “I love the way you put your shoes away” rather than “Good boy” • Join their world/spend positive time together/build a relationship with your child • If behaviour is a problem, look at how often and when it is occurring/what might it be communicating
‘Hearing’ at home This involves creating a world in which our children know that their needs will be met, without the need for them to create behaviours in order to get noticed.
What does ‘hearing’ at home look like in practice? • React well to positive requests for attention • Reassure anxieties and worries with balance/create a boundaried space to hear their concerns (not just before bed!) • Encourage your child to use their words to express their feelings rather than their behaviour
Take home message Remember, you are the adult in their world. The aim of parenting is that our children join our calm, not that we join their chaos.
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