Step Up Your Game: Boost Your Advising Skills With Basic Counseling Techniques Jessica Groves Academic Advisor Psychological Sciences University of Connecticut
Overview 1. What is this all about? 2. Basic counseling skills 3. Demo 4. Tips and Tricks
What is this all about? • When students share something with us – did I say the right thing? • Student example • Don’t worry, it’s easy! And you’re probably already doing it!
Who is this for? • Everyone and anyone! • Anyone who wants to better connect to students/people. • Particularly designed for Academic Advisors with little to no counseling experience or education. • Basic techniques for everyday use and tips for your toolbox. • Have a counseling background? A lot will sound familiar to you. • This is not….
Jess Groves • Education • Psych BA from SUNY Purchase • Counseling MA from The College of New Jersey • Academic Advisor • SUNY Purchase • All LAS undergrads, At-risk, Probation, Dismissed, Athletes • University of Bridgeport • Pre-Majors, Probation, Dismissed, Athletes • UConn Psychological Sciences • All Psych majors
Dispel Myths 1. “Counseling techniques” 2. “I am not a counselor” 3. Advisors are unprepared or unwilling
Why Does This Matter? • Student conversations don’t always stay within academics • Referring too quickly • The Advisor’s reaction is very important! • Liminal Advising: Occupying the space with a student between Advising and Counseling • Helping a student open up to you: trust and rapport • You may already be doing some or most of this!
Basic Counseling Skills: Invitational Skills • Active Listening • Let the student tell their story – Listen! • The need to communicate and be understood is central to the relationship. Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques. Chapter 5
Basic Counseling Skills: Invitational Skills • Nonverbal Communication • Body Language • Eye Contact • Body Position • Silence • Tone • Expressions/Gestures • Distance • Touch Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 5
Basic Counseling Skills: Invitational Skills • Encouragers • Door Openers: Nonjudgmental, encourages student to expand or explain • Ex: “What brought you in today? “ • Ex: “Tell me more about that?” • Ex: “What do you think of…?” • Ex: “You seem (sad, happy, upset, like something is bothering you). How are you feeling?” • Minimal Encouragers • Ex: “I see.” • Ex: “Yes.” • Ex: “Sure.” • Ex: “Right.” • Try to avoid overuse. Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 5
Basic Counseling Skills: Invitational Skills • Questions • Use to better understand student’s story/facts. • Why questions may lead to defensiveness; Leading questions may shut down the convo. • Avoid Closed Questions. • Yes, no, short answer questions. • Ex: How was your day? • Ex: Did you go to class? • Although, sometimes we need closed questions! Eg: Did you go to class today? • Use Open-ended Questions. • Elicits more info. • More helpful, less coercive. • Ex: Tell me about your day. • Ex: How were your classes today? Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 5
Basic Counseling Skills: Paraphrasing • Paraphrasing is part of the reflecting skills • Paraphrasing is NOT word for word parroting • Neutral restatement, non-judgmental, condensed version • Only the important pieces • Use paraphrasing to clarify student's story - It's okay to let the student know you are trying to follow the story! • Ex: “Let me make sure I’ve got it…” or “I just want to make sure I’m following…” • Respond to the last thing the student said Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 6
Basic Counseling Skills: • Feelings are often implicit Reflect Feeling • Says we understand your emotions • Normalizes student's feelings • Deepens your relationship (or establishes your relationship with a student if this is the first time you are meeting) • Follow your hunch or make a guess - the student will tell you if your wrong • Avoid "How does that make you feel?" • Keep in mind culture, gender – In some, it may not be okay to share feelings and could be hard for the student • 2 steps: • 1) Identify the feelings – use nonverbal, imagine how they feel, follow your gut, improve your feelings vocab - Feelings worksheet (attached) • 2) Articulate the underlying emotions - Start with "you feel.." or "you are ...“ Then move to feelings formula - "you feel ____ because ____" (feeling then content). Ex: You feel sad because you failed a course. • Things to avoid: • Don’t let the student ramble – don’t wait too long to paraphrase or reflect feeling Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 7
Basic Counseling Skills: Reflect Meaning • What is meaning? • When we reflect meaning we are getting to the perceptions, interpretations, values, and beliefs that are unique to each person. • Student's world-view • the world view is how they view themselves and others in their world. These are formed by gender, race, ethnicity, age, SES, family, spirituality, etc. • Why do this? • These meanings are the core reason for the surface issues. • We can help student view themselves or the situation from another perspective. • Peel back the layers • This can be difficult • More implicit than feelings • Not always in a straight line, may have to reflect feeling and ask open questions a few times before you can accurately reflect meaning • How to: • Fully comprehend the student’s situation and their feelings. • Be aware of the student’s values and beliefs. • Use intuitive thinking, trust your gut, follow your hunch – they will let you know that your wrong. • Use the feelings formula that we saw on the last slide. • “You feel _______ because _____.” You are replacing the content with meaning • “You feel ______ when _______ because _________.” “Because” connects the feeling with the meaning. Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 8
Basic Counseling Skills: Summarize • Sum it up! • Synopsis of info that you have gathered • Paraphrasing vs Summarizing • Paraphrasing: Reiterating what student said. • Summarizing: Summing everything up - what they said (content, feeling, and meaning) and what you said. • Clarify • Types of Summaries • Focus – Focus on what the student was talking about. • Signal – Making sure you are on the same page (usually use this one when getting to know a student). • Thematic – Themes. • Planning – Plans going forward (usually use this one when working with a student on probation or one of my advisees). Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 8
Nonjudgmental Listening Cycle Young, M.E. (2009). Learning the Art of Helping: Building Blocks and Techniques . Chapter 8
Demo • When did I use: • Invitational Skills • Active Listening • Nonverbal Communication • Encouragers (Door Openers and Minimal) • Open Ended Questions • Paraphrasing • Reflecting Feeling • Reflecting Meaning • Summarizing
Tips and Tricks: Adlerian • Prescribe The Symptom • Ex: For a student who struggles with procrastination, tell them that they can procrastinate from 5-7pm, but after that, they must do work from 7-8pm. • Push Button Technique • Use when student feels they are a helpless victim of other people. Shows student that they can control and create feelings. Help them remember a pleasant time and those feelings associated with it and then switch to an unpleasant time and those feelings. • Act As If • Ask the student to try on a successful role – act like a successful student would. What would you be doing? Can you try that for a day? • Goal Setting/Task Setting • Develop a plan and work towards specific actions regarding that problem. • Ex: You did not meet with your advisor early enough last semester to register on time and you did not get all the courses you wanted. Let’s make plan to meet now and a few weeks before registration. Cory, G. (2009). Theory and Practice of Counseling and Psychotherapy and Manual , 8e. Belmont, CA.:Brooks/Cole.
Tips and Tricks: Person Centered • Genuine and Authentic • Be genuine and authentic when working with students. Be invested in them and in their story. • Real Care • Remember bits of their story and ask them later about it – I remember last time you told me you have a big family event coming up, how did that go? • Open and Honest • When the relationship is established, you can openly share your thoughts and feelings about the student’s decisions or thoughts. • Share Yourself With The Student • When appropriate, you can show empathy or understand by sharing a situation that was similar that you went through. Cory, G. (2009). Theory and Practice of Counseling and Psychotherapy and Manual , 8e. Belmont, CA.:Brooks/Cole.
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